But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.


Do you know what you can buy with 50 cents? Respect.

Don't think for a second we were on a bus ride home.

I've only just begun to love When A Heart Breaks by Ben Rector, thanks to Mia's suggestion for Scene 7 of Bajet, Ah? but I already have to link it to incredibly bittersweet nostalgic memories. I suppose, you can compare this to the previous emotionally overwhelming event I had, which was SOMTI, in the sense that I think it'll impact me so hard I can do nothing but cry in a corner each night but in reality get over it in a week, but I really believe I will never forget how these past two weeks made me feel.

We did our best, and to be honest, it was amazing. We didn't win however, and naturally I am very disappointed. But even the disappointment of not getting placed and knowing we were good enough to can't mask the things I feel for the drama team itself - my drama team.

When we started, I was skeptical. We recruited a couple of juniors from choral speaking, one from last year's drama and one of his buddies who didn't even officially join as well as fellow classmates. I didn't really know them, and found one of them attractive. I thought, my only job in this project was to direct and win. That was it. To be Miss Bossypants and secure victory.

That was not the case however.

I'm ashamed to admit, I did give up on them after a couple of days of dwindling about, none showing commitment nor interest. Soon after though, everything just changed. As much as I wanted to win, I knew that this experience was going to be priceless. (Later, I would cry my eyes out knowing I was right.) But that was the it; my objective was no longer solely victory - it was to make sure that I'm having fun and so are my actors & crew and perform to our full potential. Thankfully and gratefully, that was what we did.

With Adam's YOLO motto, there are little incidents that I will now vow to never ever forget to remember;
  • Yang Ler's lisp ("I was born this way, okay!")
  • Adam's substitution (which is one of the best decisions I've made in my life so far, even though I can't take full credit for it)
  • Adam The Person and Adam The Adam
  • The Drama Club Fanning Ceremony, officiated by Mia Meor
  • The tin foil tiara that made Yang Ler a princess and Shi Hou an anime prince
  • All the days that we wanted to practice but couldn't due to the unavailability of the stage and/or absence of certain key persons
  • Mia's knee injury while dancing with Tina, at which I panicked but still managed to get some ice
  • Tina completely spamming my notebook with ridiculously accurate doodles
  • Putting make up on Yang Ler, which he surprisingly reacted well to
  • Seeing him out of the comfort of this school uniform for the first time, and realising he's skinnier and more muscular than I expected him to be
  • Adam and Aswad being grateful they had ""masculine"" roles
  • Zhi Cong snoozing while his best friend was being tortured by getting in touch with his feminine side
  • The jamming session we had the first time I brought my speakers
  • The first ever time Aswad exaggerated his McD scene and had me in stitches, wondering how in the world did Mia and Rachel maintain their stoic faces and Adam his angsty puppy one
  • DJ Yangbeatz and "They call me Lee Yang [insert title here] Ler" 
  • Zhi Cong's effort on trying to be Luke, but ending up being The Muscle on Puteri's crew and the minor role as Customer #1, honorary ustaz from China
  • Rachel and half of her wardrobe
  • Yang Ler's little dilemma of needing to shishi but not knowing how to in his pelekat
  • His earlier problem of the tummy that doesn't want to stick to his real one and the fear of his pelekat falling off
  • Our priceless sauce counter and cashier
  • The eternal gratefulness that Aswad didn't pick either play but decided to do both the BM and the English one
  • "Eh, butterfly!"
  • Not breaking down at all throughout the entire competition, unlike the choral speaking one
  • Adam being extremely famous amongst the Sri Aman girls, and us suspecting of Yang Ler being jealous
  • Fawning all over 6 year old Aisyah Arman after our performance
  • Yang Ler's incredibly pathetic Tap Tap skills
  • His equally pathetic facial hair, even after two weeks of not shaving
  • His odd similarities to being an ape and/or Monkey Fist
  • The double stinkbomb at the competition
  • Our unforgettable props, done with sweat and blood by the crew
  • Messing up Yang Ler's parting on the first day I did his hair, and then getting a "Now you know how to comb my hair properly!" on the last day
  • Wiping my powdered hands on his lap and him saying "Eh, eh, nevermind, I have another one here! *gestures at other lap. It's my father's one you know! HAH HAH TAKUT!"
  • Evangeline of Taman Sea's orgasmic butter cake
  • James Lim, the ladies' men of Damansara Jaya Drama Team.
  • Yang Ler and Teeter (the crazy amount of shouting and/or cursing he did, and that time he passed a level just by shifting his seat)
  • Patting the duct tape onto Yang Ler's tummy and his reaction ("EH, don't hit my tummy!")
  • Dragging Zhi Cong off the table and across the block because he couldn't find the toilet
  • Making icing until midnight
  • Not sitting down for the entire bus ride home, because both Puteri & I involuntarily became stewardesses (of which Yang Ler's demand for a cherry on a chocolate cupcake caused me to fall onto Aliah's lap, disrupting her lunch time)
  • Getting high on cupcakes and had a party on a bus, where my accidental change in flash settings made us look like we got knocked out after the competition and went clubbing instead
  • Everybody's emotional mug shot clips
  • The salute Aswad, Shi Hou and I gave Puan Shaja as she left the parking lot
  • Feeling significant
I think that's really it.
With these people, I feel significant. And who doesn't want to feel that way?

I had to shout my lungs off for them to start the scene, and search the ends of the Earth for my boys, but everything was perfect at the end. I'd like to say that it's my work, but let's be honest, I couldn't have done anything without Ming's incredible script, nor did I could I have done much without incredible actors. I just seamed them all together.

But this I must say - we are incredible.

We don't need trophies, titles or certificates to say that we are. I know we are. Yang Ler may or may not be joking the entire time, but he spoke the truth: "It's not about the winning!"

Yes, my boy. It's about the memories I've created with you lot. It's priceless - extremely priceless - and you all complete my painfully pathetic high school life. I literally could not have a better drama team, not a better supervising teacher, even if I handpicked them myself. Last year's was awesome, but this year's is amazing. We had fun. We had time to have fun. I'm okay with words, but I may not have expressed myself enough or even correctly here. To be honest, I don't even know exactly why this is such an emotional rollercoaster, but from the bottom of my soul, I thank you very much. I had the time of my life.

Let these drunk (just because it wasn't in a club, doesn't mean it wasn't just as crazy) photos be the symbol of our hardships, Frank.
Some photos courtesy of Anis, Nabila, Fara and Puan Amirah

(Yang Ler being a complete badak with his signature -__-)

This would've been one of the most adorable pictures ever!

We'll end this post with a delicious pizza, shall we?

I knew I was fine, 
About this time yesterday. 
I don't need answers; 
I just need some peace.