But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.


And it's all that I can hear.

Do you remember all the city lights on the water?
You saw me start to believe for the first time.

I have taken the effort, multiple times, to explain myself to some people. In the end, after half an hour or so, they wouldn't understand me any more than they did before. Probably only the fact that I'm more complicated than you think. I'm not sure if they can't link my likes & preferences or they just simply can't catch up, but they just can't get it.

I guess I'm proud to be complicated.


So since we had free periods right up to period 9, the whole class was buzzing with the freedom of after-exams. I started talking to Yisian, right in the middle of class, on the floor. First we talked about the places I've been to holiday to, and we agreed that I was lucky to travel that much. But it's even worse to know that you've been around the world, but you can't remember a thing because you were too young or engrossed with the wonders of French ice cream or distracted by having cool breezes every day.

Then I started being nostalgic & thoughtful and asked them a question; 

"Now that we're in high school, and you probably can't imagine your life without your friends; it practically revolves around them. But 10 years from now, once we've gone separate ways, studied separate fields, taken separate jobs, maybe even live in separate continents, would we remember who we sat next to in Form 3? Would we send still stay in touch, write letters at the very least? Would we get invited to each other's weddings? Would we remember that day when we were suppose to do a project but ended up camwhoring around my room? Would we remember the day we both went to Disney on Ice and giggled like 5 year olds again? Would we remember that story I wrote and filled the exercise book with? 

Would we even cross each other's minds?"

Je vous aime, mon chéri. Je le veux dire. ♥


I can see your shadow.

Because sometimes, all I need is escape.

There are many things I want to talk about today. Seeing as I'm in my writing mood;

  1. I made a playlist for moments when I'm feeling emo or depressed, be it with a decent reason or no reason at all.
    And I feel like such a hypocrite. 'Cause I just tweeted how depressed some people despite them still being at the age of 15. I mean, you can still get a child's ticket in England when you're 15. And you make it seem as if you have more problems than a divorced woman twice your age. Seriously? Yvonne said, maybe we're not exposed enough. I think we're exposed to decent things. They may not be productive or beneficial for our near future, but at least it doesn't get us depressed as fuck.
  2. Father said the police might come and snatch my laptop away.
    I sort of wish it won't happen, but I sort of wish it does. Because if it gets taken away, means all the things that I've saved on this computer will be lost, like all my files since I was 9 up to 12 when my dad formatted the computer about a year ago. I guess it helps me find closure. I tend to get attached to insignificant things, even though the story behind it is pathetic.
    But then, if it gets taken away, he promised to get me a new laptop. This means I'll have a chance to get Windows 7. So I'll be able to get a SonyPro or whatever and I can make videos and make my ships happen.
  3. I honestly wish I'd have enough motivation to make myself write in a neater penmanship. I'm inspired by Nicole & Yisian.
    Because I almost never finish what I start. I'd get motivated at first, but it will fade rather fast. I'm worried I might have commitment issues, and I make up excuses. I swear, I'm gonna become my own Jekyll & Hyde soon enough. 
That wasn't much, was it?
So today, during agama, since I finished early - because I didn't know half the answers - I was forced to entertain myself for an hour and a half. This resulted in my question paper being covered with 59 confessions I've wanted to say face-to-face. I would, but it's too harsh. And if they listen to me, then there would be nothing distinctive about them.

This, I noticed, also means that my level of tolerance has decreased to, uhh, almost nothing. I should realise that nobody's perfect and everyone's going to have more than 1 trait that I'll dislike. It's in everyone. 

God, I hate being hot-tempered and easily annoyed.

Je vous aime, mon chéri. Je le veux dire. ♥