Hana's spectacular post have given me sudden inspiration.
& I'm in the mood to write.
Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?
People have asked me numerous times if I was going to Leo's dinner. Often the same people.
The answer's always no.
I'll tell you why.
Because I don't have a ticket. I'm not allowed to enter without a ticket, am I not? Right. And as you know, it's quite hard to get tickets as they sold out pretty early.
Because I only own 3 dresses; one is black, a rather low cut & long, I wore that one to the St. Johns' Annual dinner back in 2009, I don't like it very much; one is royal blue with quite a nice bodice, it would've fit the Glitz & Glamour theme, but apparently everybody's wearing tube minidresses; the other is a knee-length black georgette, my favourite, but I've worn it to last year's Leo event. I'm too lazy to go shopping for another one & I'd rather go shopping along Oxford Street, hopefully next year.
Because I realised I'm unbearably awkward around groups of people, let alone a party. My friends say it isn't obvious, or maybe they're being nice, but I don't like it. I'd much prefer daydreaming on my excessively-comfy bed.
Because there are certain people that I'd rather not see more than 5 days a week. Because when I see them more than that, I start over-analyzing the little things they do and it stirs up a hatred inside me. It's just one of those issues I have. Too much of a good thing is a bad thing, no?
Because I have too many unread storybooks. My mother complains about it, as does my friends, because I'll almost always leave Borders and MPH with a new storybook. I have to read them, and what better time than when you have all day tomorrow to stress about your homework and half of your friends are dancing their feet off a mile away, so they can't distract you? And at least I leave the strain of reality, even if it's just for a while.
Because I'd like to save as much money as I can for the planned London trip next year, or maybe the baker's boy hat from Accessorize. I've been dying to travel to England ever since I came back, and this time, my mum and I decided to go to the theatre everyday, just because it's the norm & it's a luxury I hardly get here.
Because my father isn't home tonight and I intend to stay home and enjoy the bliss of his absence. This is something that happens often, but never planned. If he was here, I wouldn't be long enough in the computer chair for it to become even slightly warm from my body heat. Now, it's peace.
Because I'd like to listen to my own choice of music, whether it's badass Panic! or the rare Bunkface or something touching like Keane depending on my current mood, and not mainstream songs, although I know I'd probably not realise it until it's almost over.
Because I don't want to miss Criminal Minds, the TV show that I've recently been hooked on. I've developed an exceptional fondness for Matthew Gray Gubler, especially in Season 6 because he's sporting shorter hair. Since I can't hang out with him in reality, I'd like to spend some time in front of the TV taking in and getting inspired by Dr. Spencer Reid's intelligence and fast speech, admiring Matthew for remembering and reciting his lines very well, wondering what he'd be like in real life and pretending to be an FBI agent myself.
So, no, I'm not going to Leo's.
Instead I'm at home, wearing a comfy t-shirt I used to wear to my tennis lessons and boxer shorts, imagining about my dreams about my future, with only my mum in the same room as me, finished Entwined by Heather Dixon, saved however much money that the the ticket cost, completely dad-free, listening to 'Somewhere Only We Know' and wishing I could make videos to that song and watched the ever-amazing Reid in figuring out the suspect in 'Safe Haven'.
I had a good night. I hope you did too.
Je vous aime, mon chéri. Je le veux dire. ♥